Thursday, April 16, 2009

S. Tia Brown: Relationships, Relationships, Relationships

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This week I look at issues of respect from both co-workers and your nearest and dearest.
I am 28-years-old and work in an office full of 45-56 year-old women. My issue is how to talk to them when they say things I do not like without being disrespectful. - Young & Angry In The Office

Dear Young & Angry In The Office,
I’m a firm believer of showing deference to elders, however the office isn’t the place to act out societal roles— you’re there to do your job. I firmly believe that the only way to get respect is to demand it. Some people have that certain thing about them that ensures people, whether they’re older or younger, never test them. Other people have to go get it. So how do you command respect? First, you always make sure that you’re on top of your game, for the work environment that means being efficient, punctual and dependable. Second, you have to speak up for yourself and address every infraction in a stern, tactful, professional way. That may mean giving a soliloquy about respect (such as, “we’re all on equal footing here, I give respect and I expect it,”) or taking people aside an individual when they say something that you deem is inappropriate. Only you can determine which approach will work best. Overall you want to make sure that you leave personal roles at home, these ladies are not your aunties, and they’re your co-workers –who likely take issue with working with someone 20 years their junior – so treat them as such.

My fiancé and I are planning a big, lavish, wedding and we have restricted our families to only inviting a certain number of people, so as not to exceed my parent’s budget. My fiancé’s family is insisting on inviting many more people than they are allotted and it has caused the price of the reception to soar. Do you think that I should demand that his family pay for some of the reception, or at least the head count of the additional people that they are inviting, or does that break some etiquette rules?Breaking the Bank for the Big Day

Dear Breaking the Bank for the Big Day,

Etiquette was out of the door once your future in-laws stepped on your toes and didn’t respect your parents’ budget. Since they —like many others—love to plan with other people’s money I would like to tell you to just make them pay for their extra guests, but that could potentially cause long-term strife with your hubby-to-be. Consequently, you need to speak with him first and make sure you’re on the same page about the finances and the numbers. If both families were given an equal amount of guests then it is up to him to make sure that he stands firm by your side when you speak with his family. During the conversation make sure to reiterate that the day is you and your fiancé’s, but you understand why it is to the family, but your parents – who are paying – have given you a budget and it is disrespectful to expect them to pay any excess. Let them know the precise number of people that they are allowed to invite and that any extra guests must be pre-paid for by specific date if they are to be seated. You can also opt to include your parents in on the meeting. I doubt that your future in-laws will speak recklessly or be callous about spending your parents’ money in their faces. With that said…standing firm is only possible if you are financially independent of your in laws. You don’t want to play hardball with someone who’s helping to pay your rent/mortgage or watching your kids for free. So make sure that you’re in a position where you can’t be penalized for standing up for yourself – and your parents – or you may end up paying a bigger price later.

Scurv’s Corner: Black Love Gone Bad

 

 

Brandy Has a New Show!

Well it seems that everyone and their momma is getting a television deal. First off Brandy is going to be heading back to the small screen in a new sitcom on ABC called "This Little Piggy" where she will be playing the high-maintenance wife of a man who takes in his younger siblings. It also seems that Keisha Knight Pulliam and Fantasia will be getting reality shows of their own. Keisha's show will be about her and her boyfriend Kaseem Penn's life in ATL, and Fantasia's show will just be about her life as a performer and a mother. Now not to sound like a hater but when did Keisha Knight Pulliam become such a big deal, first people start making fake Twitters about her and now a reality show. WTF???
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Posted By LadyBaby to Your Black Gossip at 4/16/2009 12:36:00 PM

Queen Latifah’s Problems with her Stylists

 

Queen Latifah

Hip Hop star turned actress Queen Latifah is being hit with two separate lawsuits from former stylists for a total of roughly $1M dollars.  In both cases, the women claim that Latifah owes them back fees for consulting with her on her Covergirl and Curvations lines. 

What’s worse for Latifah is that the suits threaten to expose her lifestyle “whatever that may be……” Should be interesting to see what the cases expose.  This could be even worse for the Queen’s bottom line.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Black Celebrity News: What in the Hayell Were You Thinking?


Nope your eyes aren't playing tricks on you that's Diddy's chick Cassie all half shaved. Now I am not sure what the hell she was thinking maybe she was trying to be like Amber Rose or maybe she just got bored, but then again what else is a girl to do when she is irrelevant. Peep some more pics of her new look below.

I ain't even gonna hate on her she is definitely pretty enough to rock this look
Someone needs to tell her that the "Partying Like a Rockstar" trend is over

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Michelle Obama’s Fashion Criticized




The fashion world is in a quite tizzy over Michelle Obama's decision to not wear well known designers duds. Bearing claws and fangs, designers are ripping her selections worn last week to shreds with their commentary. "How dare the First Lady of the United States wear American designers’ clothes and American brands made right here in the United States," they are crying loudly. Who does she think she is buying brands that regular folks can pronounce and giving younger designers credibility that would have taken decades to achieve? These questions were being asked online, on talk shows and cable news by designers. Mrs. O has lost her mind , according to the fashion industry experts, because she wears sensible, stylish, chic and affordable clothes that everyday American women have fallen in love with in spite of the media’s criticism.
Designer show rooms are bare and showing signs of an economy in despair. The recession has not only hit Wall Street and Main Street, but 57th Street as well. The fashion district is hurting and designers are taking their frustrations out on Mrs. O and the political pundits are reporting their pain.
But much to the pundits surprise and dismay, Mrs. O has become an enduring figure in last the few months. She has admiring fans crashing J Crew's website daily and giving the world a taste of Nashville by wearing rhinestones before noon. And her shameless display of her fit arms have many pundits joining the NRA in protest. I keep asking why has her fashion style created so much discord among designers and political pundits. When political pundits take up the case for fashion designers and turn their critical lens on Mrs. O's apparel nightly, you know it is a slow news day.

Click to read.